The Adventures of Compost Man

By Daniel Kaplan
5th Grade, Los Angeles County
Fremont Elementary School - Sherri Downer, Teacher

One sunny day in the farmlands of the Central Valley of California, a girl named Olivia came running down the street screaming, "Help, Compost Man! Help!"

"What is it, Olivia?" Compost Man asked.

"Soil Stealer is stealing all of the compost from our garden composter!" Olivia explained.

"That fiend," Compost Man said.

Then they got in the Tractor of Truth and drove toward the garden.

"Stop right there," Compost Man said heroically.

"Yeah," said his sidekick, Dirt Lad. "Compost plays a crucial role in our agricultural exports. Without compost, we won't be able to grow enough healthy food and our soil will be depleted!"

"That's too bad," Soil Stealer said, "I need compost for my own garden."

"Why don't you make your own compost out of things like apple cores and watermelon rinds?" Compost Man asked.

"But then I wouldn't get to steal your compost anymore," Soil Stealer snarled.

"Exactly," exclaimed Compost Man.

"But I like stealing your compost," Soil Stealer said.

Then Compost Man declared, "Okay then, I'll fight you for it!" And that began their epic battle.

First, Soil Stealer tried to beat Compost Man with fertilizer. But it was no match for the nutrients in compost, otherwise known as "black gold."

"Ha, ha" said Compost Man, "You'll never beat compost. It is an important factor in protecting our water supply, and it is made by worms."

"Not worms," Soil Stealer said, "I'm allergic! Achoo! Achoo!"

"Ha, ha," Compost Man said.

Then Soil Stealer shouted, "I'll be back!" as he drove away in his evil-mobile.

One week later...

Once again, Olivia came running down the street screaming, "Help, Compost Man!"

"What is it this time? Compost Man asked.

"Soil Stealer is stealing the compost again!" said Olivia.

"This time we won't let him get away," said Dirt Lad. So again they got in the Tractor of Truth and drove toward the garden.

When they got there, they didn't see Soil Stealer hiding behind a bale of hay. Then, when Compost Man had his back turned, and Dirt Lad was checking out the other side of the garden, Soil Stealer got a rope and put it around Compost Man and tied him to a chair. When Dirt Lad saw this, he said, "Don't worry. I'll go get help," and ran off.

"Finally, I have defeated Compost Man!" Soil Stealer said.

"You may have defeated me, but you'll never defeat compost! It encourages healthy root systems," Compost Man said.

"Wow, very interesting," Soil Stealer said sarcastically. "Now I'm going to steal your compost."

Then Compost Man said, "Not so fast!" and he used his mightiest superpower the Compost Blast. Suddenly, there was a huge explosion.

When the smoke cleared, the ropes were gone. Worms were everywhere, and Soil Stealer was on the ground, trembling and sneezing. Just then, Dirt Lad and the cops arrived and took Soil Stealer away. Once again, the day is saved by Compost Man and Dirt Lad!